Friday, December 11, 2009
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Only in Israel folks, only in Israel.
And the FUCKING SCUM called "muslims" CLAIM that their pagan chief moon god allah penis butter sammiches (the pagan arabs had 365 gods, and the one called "allah", the moon god, was the "chief" god, kind of like Zeus...the worthless, living barf puddle known as "mohammed" just appropriated the name "allah" since it was already used as the "highest" god... of course, most of "islam" is appropriated...made up by a power hungry nut) is the same as the God of Abraham... yeah? SO what's wrong with someone praising this God on the Temple Mount? What's the problem? What's the GOD DAMN FUCKING ORDEAL, you WORTHLESS, EVIL SATANIC TOOLS?
Yeah, I have a problem with the DISEASE called "islam" all right-- like the hadiths that say "The Day of Judgement will not come until you fight the Jews and KILL THEM". Some "religion" you got there tough guy, that calls for GENOCIDE against the true people of God....
AND YOU PUNK PUSSY ASS BITCHES CALLING YOURSELVES "POLICE" IN ISRAEL THAT ENFORCE THIS EVIL- WERE YOUR FATHERS OR GRANDFATHERS KAPPOS FOR THE NAZIS, YOU IGNORANT WASTES OF FLESH?
Want to know the UNBIASED TRUTH about islam? Read the KORAN and the HADITHS and see for yourself. Which of the many different versions of the "word of god" you read I can't advise...you'll just have to pick whatever you find at your local muslim bookstore or website.
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
The Secret Landlord SocietySo how long after one offers a property for rent, becoming a “landlord”, does it take for the Secret Landlord Society (SLS) to approach and indoctrinate? You’ve never heard of the Secret Landlord Society? Well, DUH! It’s a SECRET society! But you definitely have been under their influence at SOME point in your life (if you have ever rented or even just worked in an office building). And this apparently is an international organization, as complaints about landlord behavior are a world-wide phenomenon.
What exactly does the SLS do? Well, they provide the new landlord with “the book”, or at least “the instructions” on how to be a landlord… you know, how to become a complete asshole in 3 easy steps? 1) Buy building, 2) place “for rent” ad, 3) accept tenant (written lease not necessary, see “Landlord Games and Tricks”, chapter 4 of the SLS manual)…
The Secret Landlord Society and their instructions are the only possible explanation for why seemingly decent, rational individuals seem to become creatures motivated purely be evil, selfish greed, but overcome with an irrational stupidity as well. You and I know that if you don’t spend $150 to fix that leaky pipe, the wall/ceiling will crumble and it will then cost $2,000 to repair. Landlords don’t seem to get this, preferring to fix things with tape, paint, and sometimes drop ceilings (so they can just replace ceiling tiles instead of actually fixing leaks).
The SLS also must be the source for products that only landlords seem to be able to acquire, like “John Wayne” Toilet Paper- you know the stuff- 120 grit sandpaper, it’s rough, tough, and don’t take no shit. Paper towels that rip while still in the dispenser, and you have to use a wad of them to dry your hands anyway. Paint that doesn’t even stick to itself. Nails or screws that apparently come curved from the manufacturer, so they don’t go all the way in, and nail heads stick out from floors, walls, and ceilings… etc. etc.
And of course the SLS manual teaches the new landlord how to respond to complaints with choice one-liners like: “I love the house I’m renting to you more than the one I live in”, “But I’m subsidizing your rent already- I lose money every month”, and “Why do you want a written lease? I trust you!”…
Monday, November 9, 2009
More Worthless Chinese CRAP
"THEY" told us that they were closing their U.S. factory and having everything made overseas because "WE" demanded lower prices... and the "only" way "they" could achieve this was by having everything made elsewhere. THEY LIED!!!!
First of all, I didn't DEMAND lower prices, except for obvious rip-offs. I don't deny a man his living, or delude myself into thinking stores can sell merchandise with no profit. But fair is fair. Selling an item for $39.95 that costs $1.57 is nuts. And if I tell the seller that I am not going to buy that item unless the price drops, the seller has a choice: ignore me and hope some other fool buys it, or lower the price to a point where more people will buy, or raise the price and attempt to foist that the item is "elite". Whatever... usually, we like to believe that buyers set the market. If people stop buying an item because it is too expensive, the price will be lowered or the item will no longer be on the market.
The big scam that's been foisted on all of us is that the same high quality item that was too expensive to be made in the USA is now being made elsewhere (most likely China) at a lower cost. Of course, what is actually happening is that a piece of CRAP is being made in China, and being perpetrated on us as a "lower priced" version of the original. And an awful lot of true GARBAGE is being made in China and sold elsewhere. Stuff that is not even functional. I'm not just talking about the famous poisoned items, i.e. pet food, baby formula, toys... I'm talking about regular items that are just so poorly made they aren't worth the plastic and rusty "steel" they're stamped out of. Take this example: the mini-me's decided they need some tools so that, just like Pops, they can pretend to fix things around the house too. So the Mobile Vaginal Life Support Fortress (aka Wife) went to a nearby "Dollar Store" (aka Turd Worlder Owned Funky Smelling House of Overpriced Turd World Refuse To Sell To Stupid Americans) and purchase a couple of "Six Piece Ratcheting Screwdriver" sets. There are 5 driver bits, plus the handle, as shown in the accompanying picture. Only one problem. The bits have a hex shaped SOCKET on their ends opposite the bits (i.e. phillips head). The ratcheting handle ALSO has a hex shaped socket on its end. And there is NO adapter piece of any sort to allow one to plug the bits into the handle and actually use them. And no, it's not a simple matter of the piece being left out of this package. ALL of the packages are the same: SIX PIECE, does indeed mean SIX pieces- 5 bits and the handle. And while the English-as-a-7th-language manager of the "dollar store" truly appeared as amazed as we were, do you think he immediately removed all the stock of these items for return to his supplier? Nope. He told us "you want pick someting else"? Yeah- hand me my 2 dollars back, and I'll use them to pick my teeth. So be ware- if you want a ratcheting screwdriver, just go to K-Mart, err sorry, -Sears-, and buy one.
Friday, November 6, 2009
So today, at 6:20 AM, the train arrived, at stop #3 into it's 2 hour journey to the Emerald City (aka NYC). As the train pulled up to the platform, we working saps noticed that it appeared to be unusually crowded so early on. And when the doors opened and we shuffled aboard, we noticed why the train was crowded- it was full of Yankees "fans", resplendent in their brand new Yankees hats, brand new Yankees jackets, and brand new Yankees jerseys, on their way to a parade to celebrate the Yankees World Series win #8,342 (or something).
Of course REAL fans like to point out that they've had their Yankees paraphernalia for years, or at last certainly from much earlier in the season than the END.
Another lone act by a deranged individual (who happens to be muslim)...nothing to see here...move along...move along...
Maj. Hasan, raised a Muslim, had wanted to go into the military against his parent's wishes, but he was taunted by others after the terror attacks of Sept. 11, his cousin said.
A former Fort Hood colleague of the shooter said Hasan would frequently make "outlandish" comments.
"He said maybe Muslims should stand up and fight against the aggressor," retired Col. Terry Lee told Fox News. "At first we thought he meant help the armed forces, but apparently that wasn't the case. Other times he would make comments we shouldn't be in the war in the first place."
Hasan had been optimistic that President Obama would start pulling troops out of Iraq and Afghanistan, Lee said, but when that didn't happen as quickly as he hoped, Hasan became angry."
"The motive for the shooting wasn't clear, but Hasan was apparently set to deploy soon, and had expressed some anger about the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan."
Federal law enforcement officials told The Associated Press that Hasan had come to their attention at least six months ago because of Internet postings that discussed homicide bombings and other threats. The officials said they are still trying to confirm that he was the author.
One of the Web postings that authorities reviewed is a blog that equates homicide bombers with a soldier throwing himself on a grenade to save the lives of his comrades.
"To say that this soldier committed suicide is inappropriate. Its more appropriate to say he is a brave hero that sacrificed his life for a more noble cause," said the Internet posting. "Scholars have paralled (sic) this to suicide bombers whose intention, by sacrificing their lives, is to help save Muslims by killing enemy soldiers."
They say an official investigation was not opened". Yeah, cause heaven for fend we might insult the almighty islam.
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Dick Shaped Helmets, Capes, Obscene Architecture in Star Wars....
OK, so why do the helmets (that we are often forced by law to wear or have our children wear) have to be shaped like penises (penii???)? Is it so junior can shave 1/10th of a second off his downhill coast time in the "Training Wheel Olympics", due to the "aerodynamic" shape? Or is it just because some pervert designed the ugly things?
And speaking of organ shaped helmets- what the hell was up with the designer of Darth Vader's outfit? I mean, the useless capes of Darth and Lando could be tolerated as some fashion statement of a long-ago time period, in a galaxy that is far, far away...but that damn queer looking helmet on Vader? Who designed the whole Vader outfit- the Emperor?? The same guy who designed C3P0 as a flamer? The only fear the Darth Vader helmet strikes in me is that Vader will want to show me his "saber", and I ain't talkin' bout the one made of light...
And segueing smoothly from helmets to Star Wars- come on, I know I'm not the ONLY one to have noticed that the buildings in "Star Wars Episode 2: Attack of the Clones" look like giant vaginas. The oddest thing is that I've scoured Goolge and Bing looking for a picture to prove this, and haven't been able to find a single picture of these buildings...hmmm....is Lucas hiding something?!? Who designed this set art- H.R. Giger???
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
TRAFFIC CONTROL DEVICES...
Traffic lights, stop signs, orange cones, "Jersey" barricades... all these devices (as well as the laws regarding their obeisance) are ostensibly put in place to serve one purpose and one purpose ONLY. Regardless of what Sheriff Taylor over in Buddfugg County thinks, they are not revenue generators. They are for the purpose of safety. That's it. Traffic control laws and devices are supposed to be in place to keep people safe. And in order to legally drive in this country, one must pass both a written and physical driving test, demonstrating knowledge of what such devices and laws mean...i.e. if you don't know what the 8 sided red sign with the word "STOP" in the middle is for, you shouldn't be driving. You probably shouldn't be allowed out in public either.
So why does it seem like so many people have no clue whatsoever as to what a blinking red light means? Every morning while I await my bus, I observe the nearby intersection, with it's 4 way blinking red lights (the lights resume normal cycles at 6AM). And everyday I see not only stupid assholes (including school buses and oil tanker trucks) who fly through the intersection without even slowing down, but I also see the truly selfish ignorant assdrippings who drive on the shoulder to go around the silly fool who has actually stopped to obey the red light. I am awaiting the day, which I know is coming soon, where a tanker trunk and church van full of nuns have their fateful meet at that intersection. If I had a fully charged phaser bank at my disposal, that intersection would be littered with flaming remains of these selfish miscreants. Of course, if I had a phaser bank at my disposal, and used it to dispatch all the selfish, lazy, mean ignoramuses, the world would be a hell of a lot less populous.
Now what we really need to do is ramp up 'Green production.
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Every morning I watch as some old person shuffles decrepitly down the aisle on the train, cane in one hand, roller bag handle in the other. I'm talking people in their 70's. And I think- dammit, am I gonna have to be rolling my decrepit ass to work every morning when I'm in my 70's? Is that what I have to look forward to?
But then I realize- these people always seem to be well dressed, and get on at places like Westport, CT or Darien, CT, some of the most affluent towns in the U.S.A. Most likely, they are NOT going to work because they need the money. The only reason their shuffling to work every day instead of playing shuffle board down South is because either a: they're afraid that "retiring" will somehow just cause them to keel over dead, or b: greed.
All I know is that when I'm 70, the only work I want to be doing will be on my model railroad.
And BTW- when my hearing goes, I will not pretend that everyone else mumbles. I'll get the damn hearing aid.
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
During those times I am not invisible I am certain that I live within a giant sound stage. The evidence points to me being the star of something like "The Truman Show". Time and time again I happen to be minding my own business, moving along, when I come upon people who are just stopped- frozen- in the middle of my path. And right as I am about to go around them, they suddenly come to life, and start moving (in my way of course), as if the hidden director in the sky called out "ACTION" into their hidden earpieces.
The weirdest thing is that it's always some old bag, or cripple or someone who just oozes along real slow, when I'm in a hurry. If they waited only 5 seconds more before becoming re-animated, I would have passed them...
Friday, September 18, 2009
Hey you ignoranus- I didn't ASK you to cut my sandwich in half, so the LEAST you can do is COMPLETE the damn cut. What the hell is the point of you giving the thing some half-ass partway cut? Are you thinking ahead to the scenario of when I'm at my desk, trying to eat this thing, and I go to lift up a half, and instead of getting a half of a sandwich, I get a whole sandwich, half of which is dangling from my hand, oozing ketchup or cream cheese all over my shirt? Actually, I think you are too dumb to think of the consequences of your incompetence. You are just an idiot.
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Dieting without changing whatever it is that caused you to balloon up in the first place is just utterly pointless stupidity. It's like taking a pain killer when you've chopped off your finger... when the pain killer wears off, the damn thing is still gonna hurt. If you diet and lose a bunch of weight, what happens when you reach your ideal weight? Has your "lifestyle" permanently changed for the better?
There are 2 reasons for weight gain:
1) medical, i.e., something wrong with something in your body. Maybe there is treatment to correct the problem, maybe not.
2) taking in more than your body burns.
Number 2 is of course by far the most common cause of obesity. Sitting in front of a computer all day, sucking down bacon double cheeseburgers and large fries, then going home and sitting in front of a TV is a pretty good cause for obesity. And washing it down with all the "diet" soda in the world ain't gonna make a damn difference, fool.
You want to lose weight and keep it off? Ya got to MOVE. BURN. BURN. BURN. Succumbing to the latest "miracle pill" hype ain't gonna help either. "Super Fat Burner" pills that are just some form of barely-legal speed may make your nether regions feel like they are vibrating all day just make your wallet smaller. And $150 "homeopathic" bottles of water with a little ethanol added ain't gonna cut it either, ya dopes. If you can't lose weight on the required "VLCD" mentioned in the fine print, you probably need to see a doctor, as the reason you're large is probably #1 above, or that you are already dead...(how can you NOT lose weight on a 500 calorie/day diet???).
If you ever actually read Atkins' book, you'd know that he doesn't describe his plan as a "diet". He calls it a "lifestyle change".
I lost 60 pounds by getting out from behind the computer and hitting the track- EVERY DAY OF THE WEEK. And I WALKED on the track (no running from this fat boy). And I ate whatever the hell I wanted, pretty much. Yeah, I ate a lot of tuna and rice. But I also ate burgers. And fries. And occasionally drank soda (although it seems the HF Corn Syrup may play a role in obesity...so try to avoid that evil ingredient...HAH!). Of course, the track I hit was in Florida. And I often was out there when it was over 100 degrees. So yeah, I sweat bullets. And I did pushups, pullups, and dips. But nothing crazy. Like I said, no running. Just moving, every day. I lost the weight, and kept it off for several years... until the forces of evil sucked me back into a seat in front of a computer again. I gained 40 pounds of it back.
I hate computers.
"The campaign is primarily aimed at Israelis between the ages of 16 and 35, but will also approach those outside this age group.
"Our first goal is to find the youngest person in the country who knows how to say 'please' and ' thank you [my 3 year old does this... ed.],'" quipped Kaplan, adding that the campaign would start with the basics, such as showing courtesy on the roads and not blowing cigarette smoke into other people's faces.
"Integrity and consideration have nothing to do with the religious or secular split or with the political divide," said Kaplan. "It is about one human being [showing consideration] to another, regardless of individual views."
Hmmm.... and my PARENTS taught me manners.
Monday, September 14, 2009
Yeah, that's a horrible thing to say, ain't it? Ok, so this year we'll start a christmas-stampede-at-Walmart death toll pool.
Penny-Ante Piss-ant Power-Tripping Peasants
Prison guards who think they've accomplished something by taking away that extra pair of underwear from an inmate are Penny-Ante Piss-ant Power-Tripping Peasants.
White bitches whose HUSBANDS are rich and thinks that entitles them to take over whole rows on the train and go anywhere they want with their silly pocket-book puppies are Penny-Ante Piss-ant Power-Tripping Peasants.
Black people who purposely take up the whole aisle and move real slow, knowing some white person behind them is in a hurry, are Penny-Ante Piss-ant Power-Tripping Peasants.
People who join condominium association boards and help to pass pointless power-tripping rules that just annoy people and make life more difficult are Penny-Ante Piss-ant Power-Tripping Peasants.
Acutally, all of these Penny-Ante Piss-ant Power-Tripping Peasants are just selfish, miserable assholes, who have nothing in life, and try to make up for their worthless, miserable existences by lording what they perceive as "power" over others... of course, we who are wise to these silly bastards just laugh AT them and get on with our lives...
Friday, September 11, 2009
Today, September 11, 2009, we remember those who were murdered on September 11, 2001.
Not by George Bush.
Not by Israelis.
By muslims. In the name of the thing they call the "religion" of islam.
If you want to know the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth about islam- don't listen to any potentially biased, prejudicial, "islamaphobic" or "racist" sources. Just go directly to the ONLY absolutely 100% unbiased, unquestionable source: read the KORAN and AHADITHS and see for yourself what this "great religion of peace" is really about.
Here's an example, straight from the source, to help get you started in your understanding. This is a prophecy of the future, of what MUST occur in order for islam to finally rule the world:
"The two great Scholars of Hadeeth, ash-Shaikhaan (Imaams Al-Bukhaaree and Muslim) have narrated on the authority of ‘Abdullaah bin ‘Umar, that the Messenger of Allaah said: “You will battle the Jews until one of them will hide behind a rock. (The rock) will say: ‘O ‘Abdullaah (Worshiping slave of Allaah)! Behind me hides a Jew come and slay him.’”
The two Shaikhs have also narrated on the authority of Abu Hurairah that Allaah’s Messenger said: “The Hour [i.e. Judgement Day, ed.] will not be established until the Muslims battle the Jews. The Muslims will battle them to the point where the Jew will hide behind a rock and a tree. So the rock - or the tree - will say: ‘O Muslim! O ‘Abdullaah (Worshiping slave of Allaah)! Behind me hides a Jew come and slay him.’"
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Kid, I've flown from one side of this galaxy to the other. I've seen a lot of strange things floating in urinals. (Not sure what's stranger- the turds or the used condoms in urinals). But I've never seen anything that'll make me believe that hawking loogies into the urinal and not flushing, or splattering whiz all over the floor, is acceptable behavior, by decent, civilized people. My 3 year-old son apparently has better aim than many grown men out there, and he certainly knows to flush when he's done. You nasty, selfish bastards should just be sterilized before you can procreate and perpetuate your selfish worthlessness.
And no- hocking into a garbage can isn't the least bit acceptable either. Especially when you miss.
Friday, September 4, 2009
There are those who would argue that philosophically speaking, my blog is invisible since it seems to have a readership of one (including me). But I'm not here to talk philosphy right now. I'm here to talk about reality. Real invisibility. Yes, I can PROVE to you that invisibility is REAL.
Just come over to my house...pretty much any time. Bring some garbage- it can be a pastry or candy wrapper, a cereal box, packaging from something, dirty tissues, cat food, or even something like wet, mildewy towels or beach clothes. Then- toss these items about, on the floor or on the couch, and stand back and watch the magic happen. It will happen one of two ways:
1) At some point, between the time the object leaves your hand, and the point where it should impact with the couch or floor, the object will just vanish completely, right before your eyes.
2) The objects will NOT vanish- at least for you. But either stand back for a few minutes and observe, or come back the next day. What you will witness is that the objects have obviously become COMPLETELY INVISIBLE to all OTHER inhabitants of the house, as they will remain exactly where you dropped them, until such time as you or I come along and clean them up. Yes, that half-eaten Snack Cake will remain on the floor moldering and festering until it is either consumed entirely by insects or rodents, or until I clean it up.
I have spent almost 10 years trying to determine why I am the only member of my household that has the ability to see these invisible objects. Alas, I have still not been able to procure or invent something that will give my wife this gift of "seeing" that I have, so perhaps she could utilize some of her time at home all day (probably bored out of her skull with nothing to do) to remove these items so I don't have to when I get home from work.
The freakiest thing of all is that I myself seem to spend most of my time in some sort of state of invisibility. This is a phenomenon that has apparently been occurring to me most of my life, as my dear departed brother pointed out one time about 15 years ago...as he observed the effects of the phenomenon first hand. It seems he had the ability to see me when others couldn't. We went to some store one day to price some expensive electronic item- stereo components or something. I was gainfully employed, and wearing decent professional clothes (i.e. dress shirt and pants and shoes). Bro' was dressed like a bum... hair all askew, old t-shirt, shorts, and flip-flops. And he was unemployed. Yet when a saleswoman approached us, I was in my state of invisibility to her, as she literally reached her hand across my face (brushing my nose with her arm) to shake hands with my brother, while facing and addressing him, utterly oblivious to my presence.
And so, I continue to be almost run over or shoved aside on a regular basis, whether it's when trying to climb stairs or use an escalator in a public place, go through a doorway, enter an elevator, enter or exit a subway or train, or just walk down the street. There are a few people out there who wonder what the hell hit them, I'm sure...
Of course, it's not all bad being invisible. I've never been mugged. Thank God.
but the least you can do after brushing your teeth and spitting all over the spout and sink is to clean the spout. It would be nice if you cleaned the blobs of spittle-paste off the sink basin as well. Especially in a public restroom, where you already spent 10 minutes preening like a queen in front of the mirror, while somebody is forced to hold back a monster grunt in order to be spared the embarrassment resulting from the attendant sound effects.
Monday, August 31, 2009
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
So I'm on my way out of a retail establishment that has one door. As I approach the lone door, it opens, and several people start entering the store (these fools would have won The Daily Asshole award too- see my previous post on doorway prioritizing...). So I turn aside to let them pass into the store (I don't really have much choice as there's nowhere else for me to go). My turning aside was apparantly seen by the dripping bung pipe behind me as "his opening"...so he made his move- squeezing past me and shoving his way out the door ahead of me. Now if this douche puddle would have run to the curb and started vomiting, all would have been fine, and his behavior would have been understood and accepted. But no- this living bowel movement just kept on down the sidewalk. So I hit him with a brick, and ran like hell.
Conservative clerics backed by powerful members of the Saudi royal family oppose the efforts to liberalize the world's biggest oil exporter. Circus acts such as fire-eating and lying on a bed of glass are seen as forms of magic outlawed by sharia law.
"These acts contradict the faith and must not be done, taught, spread or encouraged," Reuters quoted religious police spokesman Abdullah al-Mashiti. "They must be fought and those performing them must be reported and punished so as to be deterred and their evil restricted."
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Ya think??? Maybe he shoulda just smoked crack instead.
Monday, August 17, 2009
I came across this in the comments section of http://michellemalkin.com/2009/08/17/time-to-ration-health-care-for-illegal-aliens:
On August 17th, 2009 at 10:23 am, malkin_fan said:
I bought a bird feeder. I hung it on my back porch and filled it with seed.. Within a week we had hundreds of birds taking advantage of the continuous flow of free and easily accessible food.
But then the birds started building nests in the boards of the patio, above the table, and next to the barbecue.
Then came the poop. It was everywhere: on the patio tile, the chairs, the table…everywhere.
Then some of the birds turned mean. They would dive bomb me and try to peck me even though I had fed them out of my own pocket. And others birds were boisterous and loud: They sat on the feeder and squawked and screamed at all hours of the day and night and demanded that I fill it when it got low on food. After a while, I couldn’t even sit on my own back porch anymore.
I took down the bird feeder and in three days the birds were gone. I cleaned up their mess and took down the many nests they had built all over the patio. Soon, the back yard was like it used to be…quite, serene and no one demanding their rights to a free meal.
Now lets see…our government gives out free food, subsidized housing, free medical care, free education and allows anyone born here to be a automatic citizen.
Then the illegals came by the tens of thousands. Suddenly our taxes went up to pay for free services. Small apartments are housing 5 families. You have to wait 6 hours to be seen by an emergency room doctor. Your child’s 2nd grade class is behind other schools because over half the class doesn’t speak English. Corn Flakes now come in a bilingual box. I have to press “one” to hear my bank talk to me in English, and people waving flags other than “Old Glory” are squawking and screaming in the streets, demanding more rights and free liberties.
Maybe it’s time for the government to take down the bird feeder.
Since there is NO WAY women can be dumb enough to NOT realize that white pants are SEE THROUGH in the sun light, I would like to thank all the nice-assed women out there for the free show. Thongs are a treat. Commando is a surprise. 300 pounds in white pants with a thong OR commando is an emetic.
As for the coin-slot sluts-- so what exactly do I get if I drop in a quarter???
but they don't fall down. At least, that's the way it was with the old toys. But dumb ass human weeblers, who wobble all over the sidewalk like drunks, will DEFINITELY fall down, when I punch them in their heads. Why do so many people seem to have trouble walking a simple straight line along the sidewalk? Maybe you should HANG UP AND WALK.
I'm not sure exactly what it is about the sight of men wearing leather loafers without socks that irks me. Maybe it's the knowledge of the God-Awful stench that rises up when those bareback piggies are peeled from the confines of the cowhide. Or just that there's something obnoxious and or pretentious about it (I only see it being done by rich white men). Or maybe it's just that it looks teh ghey.
Friday, August 14, 2009
So Where the hell is DADDY??? This dimbulb is upset that eBay keeps thwarting her attempts to auction baby #7's name... "Drummond — whose children are 19, 16, 14, 3, 2 and 1 — is due to deliver her seventh child on Sept. 16. She said the idea to sell the first name of the child, her second son, "just came" to her while thinking of ways out of her financial funk."
So she can't afford six kids, and number 7 is due... hell, I'll send her a tube of spermicide for FREE.
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Ignoranus Sues College Because She Can't Get a Job...
Read the article, then read the actual court filing... please, remember to breathe between laughing jags...
I was going to comment on various things in her filing, including the spelling and grammatical errors..but someone might accuse me of being racist or something for making fun of ebonics (of course, the person's race is mentioned nowhere)...
Yes, there certainly is a major failure here- but it ain't the college...
Monday, July 27, 2009
Like obliviot SELF WHORES who decide to have some family reunion on the busy New York City sidewalk. Under a scaffolding. Next to a phone stand. (The sidewalk gets very narrow there, in case you don't undestand...so it's NOT the ideal place to decide to stop and block the sidewalk). Or at the top of a moving escalator. Or in front of the elevator doors. Etc. Etc.
Friday, July 24, 2009
Many times I've seen news articles from outside the USA where people from other countries refer to us here in the USA as "arrogant" and/or "ignorant". The range of non-Americans calling us this is from Francophones to islamic terrorists. They call us ignorant cause we don't speak six languages, like they do. Pardon, my geographically challenged friends- the USA is bordered by two countries. One of which has inhabitants who speak either English or French. The other country is inhabited by people who speak mainly Spanish. So in the USA, the typical language choices in schools are (drumroll please): French or Spanish. The fact that some European country may share borders with countries where a bunch of other languages are spoken is a completely different set of facts compelling language studies.
As for calling us "arrogant"- that's one I just don't get. What do you mean- WE are arrogant? Are you saying that WE are arrogant because YOU believe that WE believe we are better than you? So are you saying that that is wrong, because we are all equals? Yes, I'm sure that's it- you certainly wouldn't believe YOU are somehow better than US...cause then that would make YOU...ummm... arrogant.
Old article, but says it all about China....
It says that "almost 100% of music downloaded from the Net [in China] is stolen". Here's the money quote: "Zhu doesn't believe he and his friends are doing anything wrong. "I think it's a problem with the law, not with us users," he says."
Well, actually, pal Zhu, the problem is indeed with you users. As I mentioned in a previous post, these turd worlders have no concept whatsoever of "intellectual property rights" or "individual rights" like we do. They just don't get it...at all. The idea that if someone works hard on creating something and deserves to profit from it is completely alien to these Godless communists. So, ok, we can understand that years of State brainwashing has cleared out all notions of capitalism from them. But how does one then explain the fact that they'll do anything to make money, regardless of what effect the end product has on consumers- i.e. selling poison baby formula or pet food that KILLS people or animals. Here in the USA when someone wants to cheat in the food industry, they usually do so by watering something down, or substituting cheaper (but still food grade) ingredients. Over there it seems that all they do is say "Hmmm....I need some white powder to stretch this batch of baby formula... hey, whatever is in that bucket over there at that construction site is white, grab it and throw it into the mix". How do you think that way? We ignorant, arogant Americans will never know...
Why do immigrants to the USA think anyone here is fooled when they open a business with some variant of "America" in the name, i.e.: "American Grill", "American Gas Station", etc.?
Why do the utterly insane have a compulsion to create overly wordy websites with dozens of font changes per page (i.e. various sizes and colors)? As soon as I see "font salad" on a web site, I know that at some point on the site Jooos will be blamed for everything from "global warming" to the collision of two galaxies billions of light years away...
Why do many (if not all) turd worlders have no concept of courtesy, decency, or what we silly "Americans" refer to as "civilized behavior"? [When I say "Americans on this blog, I'm of course using the term the way most of the world does- to refer to U.S. citizens...although we all know that everyone in the western hemisphere is technically "American"]. Why do so many of us "arogant ignorant Americans" insist that everyone else in the world must be just like us in the behaviors, beliefs, and undertstanding of some "universal code of human rights"??? Things that to us seem to be basic concepts of human decency, like waiting your turn, or saying "thank you", and utterly unknown to 3rd worlders, whether they're from Indian, Arabic, or Israeli. Obnoxious overaggressiveness probably has it's place in uncivilized primitive environments, where "every man for himself" is the accepted way of life, i.e. if you don't grab it, someone else will. But here in the "civilized" world, such behavior is not only unneeded, but unwanted. And of course, we accept it anyway, out of fear of "offending" (and getting knifed by) those who come from different "cultures" and haven't yet "learned" our peaceful ways. Yep, we still shop at that convenience store, that gas station, that restaurant, that 99 cent store... all though the people behind the counter treat us like the lowlife worthless "Americans" that we obviously must be.
And of course the biggest why of all- if they all hate us so much, why do they all come here? And stay here? Like those who were born here and complain about how bad the USA is...but continue to stay here. Cause there's no other place in the WORLD which they see is better.
Lots of clowns claim to hate our Red, White, and Blue, but they sure love our Green. We could start a pool on how many would die in the stampede resulting from dropping U.S. dollars from the air onto a "Death to America" rally....
And what the HELL is up with hanging foreign flags in the USA? If you CHOSE to move to and stay in the USA, what PRIDE do you have for the shithole you left behind? When my great-grandparents came to the USA (legally) in the 1800's, they left the country of their birth behind- FOREVER. Cause that country SUCKED. And treated them like SHIT. So the first thing they did when they came to the USA was learned ENGLISH. And put their kids in public school. And spoke ENGLISH. And didn't make demands on ANYONE to cater to them in any way- they took the DL test in English. And passed. They bought groceries in containers that had only ENGLISH labels. And knew what they were getting. And they DIDN'T get welfare. Or WIC. Or any other "assistance" (aka handout) from anyone. No bailouts. And their kids went on to be honest, law abiding citizens. With jobs. And they robbed no one. Jacked no one. Mugged no one. Burgled no one. Did no drugs. And they survived. With a US flag hanging from their window . They had pride all right- in being in the U.S.A.
So if "your" country is so great- why aren't you there? Why don't you go back and fix it if something's broken there? Or are you just here to rape this country- you fuckers.
Thursday, July 23, 2009
No, I didn't spell "slackers" wrong. I meant slokkers. It's a new word I made up by combing "sloth" (as in slow as a bug caught in molasses) and "walkers". Some professional level slokkers move so slow it almost appears they are moving backwards. Of course, the trick of being a slokker is that you move your slowest when you know someone behind you is in a hurry, and is trying to pass you. A pro slokker has mastered the ability of magically puffing their entire body out sideways (in both directions), thereby making it impossible for you to pass and catch that plane or train you are attempting to run for. Of course, walking in the middle of the stair case or sidewalk improves the slokkers blocking abilities. And yes, they know we know that they know. Cause they're evil. Meaning that if one were to be "accidentally" bumped while on a stair case, and they happen to tumble to the bottom in a jumble of booms, bangs, and "oh lord jesus help me i'm fallin down da stairs", you would be doing the world a favor. Cause not all of us are tourists...
People Who Deserve It! - check out this site in its entirety by-the-way...they're as pissed off as I am, but they've been doing this blog thang a lot longer!
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
"D**p***h is your complete outsourcing partner for all aspects of image processing. Our very own offshore production facility located in South East Asia, houses teams of Photoshop® artists who are trained and managed by western industry professionals." Yeah-- "Western industry professionals who are now OUT OF WORK!!". Dumb asses.
What the hell ever happened to hiring TEENAGERS to mundane work that no one else really wants to do?? There are plenty of teens out there who will gladly take $20 to: Mow your lawn, weed your garden, shovel your snow, clean your car, clip you graphics in Photoshop, flip your burgers, cook your fries, stock your store shelves, etc. etc. etc. And although it sometimes seems difficult to communicate with teens, I'd rather try it with them than with some turd worlder who just doesn't get basic concepts like, oh, flush toilets. We certainly DON'T need to import a single "guest worker", or export another got-damn job.
Friday, July 17, 2009
Endless Mystery List: The Female Mind
I'm convinced that eons past the point where the male mind has been completely unraveled, decoded, poked, prodded, probed into submission, and then stuffed in a jar to sit on a musty shelf in a university basement, scientists will still be having fistfights over where to start in their attempts to decode the FEMALE mind. Take this mystery for instance: SHORT SKIRTS.
Why? WHY?? WHY on EARTH do women wear short skirts (above the knee) only to have to subject themselves to what must be unbearable knee-locked discomfort (possibly hours on the train) in their attempts to keep some geezer from climbing the mountaintop and eyeballing their holy land? For God's sake, if you don't want anyone peeping your panties, either a) wear a longer skirt, or 2) wear some got damned pants. If, on the other hand, you have some weird voyeuristic streak and get off on showing off your netherlands, then email the details to me at once, so that I may be the judge as to whether or not you do indeed have a prize worthy pudenda.
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Monday, July 13, 2009
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
Denial of Service "Cyberattacks"
Seems like everyday we hear about some new "cyberattack" on some website or other. Some sites are down for a few hours...some for a few days. But so what? Really... so what? So some turd world script kiddy (jealous that we have clean drinking water and flush toilets) got his bad self a zombie network and ran some DDOS attack against big bad Great Satan. What exactly do these asstards feel that they are accomplishing? Do they truly believe they will somehow bring about the complete collapse of the US "way of life"? So we can't get to the US Treasury website today...like we've been there at all. DDOS attacks don't stop banking. They don't stop email. They don't kill cell phones. And what if they did? Things would be cleared up pretty quickly...and for those of us over 15 years old- the USA got by fine for 200 years without the Internet. So hey- turd world "hax0rs"- put away the silly scripts and toolkits and Google important things, like how to avoid cholera epidemics by not shitting in the same water you drink.
AND WHILE WE'RE ON THE TOPIC OF ATTACKS...
What do muslim terrorists feel that THEY accomplish with terror attacks? So they murdered 3,000 Great Satanists in one day here in the USA. Did the country fall apart and cease to exist, devolving into some quagmire of chaos and anarchy, ripe for take over??? Ummm....no. And the 11,000 or so other attacks by muslims around the world SINCE 9/11/2001 that have murdered thousands of people have also helped accomplish....???
Lately, as I come up out of the train station on my way to work, there is a woman who stands there in the walkway, with a little kid in a stroller. Of course, they have the sign out- asking for money. Today, the kid was crying. She wanted something, and the woman was saying "I don't have it". My reaction to this scene is confusion... on the one hand, I want to kill the woman for doing this to the kid (making her spend her summer days standing in a dim, dank, station tunnel while mama works her con, using the kid as a prop). I also wanted to go over, find out what their problem was, and give them enough dough to not have to stand in the station ever again. At least, for the kid's sake. Unfortunately, even if I did have the ability to blindly throw money at problems, we know from plenty of other real-world examples, that this just doesn't work. Look at the school systems- schools with some of the highest per student expenditures still have the worst performing students. Change must come from within.